Hypermodern International Congress 2175

Remember, it wasn't raining when Noah built the ark.


Olympic Mascot Death WARZ and the Continued Pussification of Signs and Symbols Under Global Hegemony

The FUWA welcome your interest in Great China Olympic Spectacle of Worldwide People and Gamesmanship competition. Perhaps you would like to pass the time by playing a little solitare?

Well it's about time to get ready to snuggle up to Red China for the 2008 Summer Olympics. The factories around Beijing and other main sites have been turned off and reassigned to less important provinces. Already the incidence of massive peasant uprisings in the West and sandstorm fog are lifting the veil on this wonderful worldwide event, and millions upon millions of prisoner workers turn their eyes proudly toward the olympic mascots - the Fuwa. The Fuwa consist of five "figures" - Bèibei, with a fish design, Jīngjing, with a giant panda and lotus design, Huānhuan, the Olympic Flame, Yingying, with a Tibetan antelope design, Nīni, with a swallow design. Together the five names form the Chinese phrase "Beijing huan ying ni", which means "Beijing welcomes you". Indeed.

But what about other sub-kistchy figures of days gone by?

Who among us could forget Waldi, the Bavarian Dacshund and mascot of the Munich 1972. Representing the key traits of Resistance, Tenacity and Agility - surely we all rememer the inspiring images of Waldi pulling a wounded Israeli hostage toward the Medivac vehicles at the airport.

Or Mitza, the cute Russian Bear of the 1980 Moscow games. In retrospect, Mitza it wasn't personal. We could never boycot that smile...

Or how about Cobi, the "cubist" (?) rendering of a Catalan sheepdog. Surely, he calls to mind the formless snickering pan-sexuality of the beginning of the Clinton era.

And of course the much maligned Izzy, short for Whatizit? Who best exemplefied our American questioning spirit through his ambiguous and unappologetic lampooning of gay mascots everywhere.

Vote for your favorite....

3 Ha ha's

Blogger Dr. H. Odom said...

I don't know if you saw these ridiculous smiley faces they had for the World Cup in Germany this past summer, but they were another banner instance of this 'pussification' of which you write. I bet the mascot for Berlin '36 meant business.

8:49 PM  
Blogger Operating Thetan said...

may i presentto you, Amik, the gay '76 Canadian beaver:


2:54 AM  
Blogger Operating Thetan said...

I would like to point out that there are 3 male Fuwa and only two females.

I would also like to point out that Carisoprodol is one hell of a pill.

3:08 AM  

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